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…..But it’s a beautiful ride!

15 Jan

Hello lovlies!
I am back from Chicago and I would say that it was a very successufl trip! I learned so much about being a Weight Watchers leader and I truly feel that I am meant to do this! I spent 3 and a half years behind the desk, weighing in members, and providing support one on one. At the time that is what I needed to do. However, through the changes in my life recently, I realized that I need to push myself. I need to step out of my comfort zone and do what is best for ME. Being a Weight Watchers leader is going to help inspire SO many people…..and insipiring them is going to inspire me. My leader helped me so much through my weight loss journey and I want to be that for someone! I was blessed to have my mom and aunt go with me and support me….but not everyone has that support. I want to be someones mom, friend, granddaughter, sister! I want to be the support that they need.

Losing weight is a journey…Its a process…and it doesnt happen over night. It has been 7 years since I started my weight loss journey and it is still difficult. I have a little talk today at a meeting to help inspire some members and someone asked me an amazing question. They asked how I changed my relationship with food and if I was okay with the fact that I can never go back to how I ate before I lost weight.

Now, before I lost weight, I was a binge eater. I would come home from school and devour chips, pretzels, and dip. I would eat at least two bowls of cereal every night before bed. And honestly eat non stop on the weekends. Food helped me feel better. I hated being the biggest girl in school, i hated not being able to wear cute clothes, and i hated disappointing my parents by not being active and involved in things. Food was my comfort. It was my drug.

When I joined weight watchers, i learned that i was addicted to food. I learned that i was a volume eater and i learned that i was also an emotional eater. I had to develop ways to stop this cycle. So, I spent hours in grocery stores and online finding recipes and snacks that had the volume but were good for me! I learned to turn to my mom or my aunt when i was feeling sad instead of turning to the food. I learned to find better coping mechanisms when i was feeling stressed. So i would read and chew gum to get my mind off of eating.

SO, to answer the question of if I miss how I used to eat before weight watchers, the answer is no. Because, tied to the way that I ate, is all of the emotions that came with it. I do not miss the excruciating pain of a best friend acting like they dont know who you are. I do not miss the embarrassment of not being able to fit in my desk. I do not miss the humiliation of having to change my clothes in front of others. I do not miss the feelings of being alone and scared.

The way I eat now brings so much JOY into my life. I am fueling my body with the nutrients it needs. The way I eat now is also tied to emotions. Feelings of confidence, empowerment, and happiness.

Don’t look at weight loss as a “diet” or a “quick fix.” It is a never ending journey….But i promise you…that it is a beautiful one!

God Bless.
xoxo – M

I’M BACK! and ready for the new year!

8 Jan

Hello everyone!!!!

I am SO sorry that I disappeared for so long. There were a lot of things that happened since September and I could not find the energy to get on here. My boyfriend of almost two years broke up with me completely out of nowhere in October. I truly believed that I was going to marry this man…and we had talked about our future many times. He told me he was planning on proposing within a year. Needless to say, this came as a shock. I was devastated, embarrassed, and heartbroken. I had to believe that God had a plan, but accepting this was very scary. Three months later, and looking back on our relationship, I realized that this was bound to happen. He was a personal trainer, I was a girl who used to be overweight and who still had insecurity/body image issues, and now I truly believe our relationship wasn’t healthy. There was the constant pressure of looking the part of “the trainers girlfriend.” I was so worried that if I had over 12% body fat he would not accept me. There were constant fights of not wanting to go to the gym, not wanting to eat out, and not wanting to drink. There were many times where I felt that he was just my trainer and not my boyfriend. However, him leaving me completely rocked my world. I no longer had a gym partner, I no longer had someone to talk to about my insecurities, and I started to become even more insecure and think that maybe I really wasn’t good enough for him….or for anyone.

Through talking with aunt, who knew my boyfriend from day one, I began to realize that I am good enough. She helped me point out the red flags and make me see that there is more to me than having a flat stomach and being the girl that lost 100 pounds. She made me realize that the right man, the man God intended me to be with, will love me for ALL of me. For my stretch marks, for my love handles, for my loose skin, and for my boobs or lack there of. She made me realize that I am worth SO MUCH MORE. And that NO girl should be made to feel that way. I would be lieing if I said that I didn’t miss him. We had great moments in our relationship. However, I think I miss the idea of what he could have been more than what he actually was. I am glad that he came into my life, because for the first time I am realizing that I need to learn to love MYSELF.

Ever since I lost my weight, I really have never been single. I would go from one relationship to the next. I truly believe it is because I wanted that guy attention, I wanted to feel that someone wanted me, because when I was overweight…..I never felt wanted. However, not I know that I really need to focus on me. It is my time. I need to appreciate all of my flaws and not expect a man to fill that void. God has made me in his image and likeness. And I am his masterpiece. I have realized that I need to learn to be alone, to feel the hurt, and to feel the anxiety and the insecurities.

Through all of this….good things happened as well! I graduated from college and now have a Bachelor’s degree in Social Work! I have officially been accepted to The University of Pittsburgh’s Social Work Master’s program and will being in the fall! I am going to become certified to be a school social worker 🙂 Also, I am flying to Chicago TOMORROW to become a Weight Watchers Leader!

I am accepting everyday that it is time for me to focus on me. To enjoy the single life. To learn to be alone and to let God lead me where he wants me to go. Everyday it hurts…But everyday it hurts a little less too.

I am so excited to be back with you guys! I will post about how leader training went this weekend!
Here’s to 2014….A new year. A new me! 🙂
God bless xoxo M 236 Fine

What I Ate Wednesday!

6 Sep

Hey all! I hope you had an amazing week. I’m not sure about you guys, but I am SO excited that today is FRIDAY! I am in need of a relaxing weekend. So as always..here is the post of “what I ate Wednesday!”

Breakfast – I woke up late..therefore I had to eat on the go! So, I made a peanut butter sandwhich with naturally more peanut butter and an Arnold’s 100% whole wheat sandwich thin! This is so easy to eat in the car….and this keeps me full until lunch time! I also had a peach along with it..they are in season now and taste AMAZING!

Lunch – I try to get as much protein as I can in for lunch. I have to eat at 11:00am at my field placement. I am not used to eating that early! So, the protein helps keep my full until the end of the day. I had baked chicken breast with roasted veggies! The veggies were zucchini, onion, & mushrooms! We roasted the vegetables on Sunday evening so I had them the entire week!

Snack – Right after my day at field, I went straight to the gym. So, on the way there I enjoyed a golden delicious apple!!

Dinner – This is one of my favorite dinners! Its super simple and easy to make, the portion size is huge, and it is so filling! Its called nutty beff noodle! It has a peanut butter sauce with green peppers and lean ground beef. Its then mixed over whole wheat pasta. You get 1 and 1/2 cups for only 9 points+!

Snack – as always, I need my snack before bed! tonights snack was special k red berries cereal with almond milk!

Let me know if there are any questions about what I eat, how I plan it out, or concerns you have! Hopefully I will have time this weekend to have another post! What kinds of posts would you all like to see??

-Live healthy and God bless! xoxo M

What I Ate Wednesday….Even though it’s Friday!

30 Aug

Hi guys! So, I am SO SORRY that I haven’t posted all week. It was my first week in field experience, which kept me pretty busy. I was also sick which didn’t help AT ALL! As promised on my Facebook page, I am still going to share with you “What I Ate Wednesday!”

Breakfast: I was able to take my breakfast to my field placement site with me which was nice! So, I took a Yoplait Greek Cherry Yogurt with 1/2 ounce of cocoa dusted almonds!

Lunch: My lunch was simple…and since I wasn’t feeling well, nothing really tasted good! I knew I needed to have something with protein and a carb. So I had a chicken breast sandwhich on an Arnold’s 100% whole wheat sandwich thin! It was so so yummy! It hit the spot since I was sick!

Snack: When I got home from field, I was so hungry. So, I had 1/2 of an Arnold’s 100% whole wheat sandwich thin with 1 TBSP of naturally more peanut butter (you can find it at walmart)

Dinner: Again, since I was sick, carbs were the only thing that tasted good! So, I had 1/2 cup of brown rice with 1/2 cup of fat free refried beans and 3 ounces of chicken breast with salsa! It was SO SO good! And it was so easy to literally just throw everything together! I had the chicken breast already cooked so everything was just microwaved. Typically on Sundays, I will bake 5-6 chicken breasts that I can eat throughout the week!

Snack: I LOVE cereal…A little too much. But, since I love it, I always have it 🙂 So, my snack was 1 cup of special k red berries with 1 cup of almond milk. Its sooo good and perfect for an easy snack!

If you guys have ANY questions about any of the food I ate feel free to ask! This week has been stressful and I haven’t been to the gym once! I knew that if I went to the gym sick, it would put me behind even more! So, I let my body heal and get better and I will be back in action come Monday!

Look for a new post soon….Do you guys have anything you want me to post about??
-God Bless xoxo M

Planning Ahead!

26 Aug


Hi everyone! I am SO sorry I haven’t posted in a few days. My boyfriend did the Tough Mudder race this weekend so I wasn’t home at all! A lot of people are asking my to make a post about how I plan out my meals in my day and by the week. Ever since I joined Weight Watchers 6 years ago, planning became a huge part of my life. It is so easy to tell yourself you are going to start eating healthy and working out….But if you don’t have a plan lined up, the chances are that you will never start!

I follow Weight Watcher points. So, I always plan a day in advance. Sunday I will write out my daily points for Monday. Monday I will plan out my daily points for Tuesday…and so on! Typically, on Saturday or Sunday I will go through all of my recipes and pick 2-3 that I will make during the week. That way I pretty much have an idea about what dinners I will have and it makes it a lot easier to plan out breakfast, lunch, and snacks. I love to plan at least a day in advance because that way, when I wake up, I don’t have to think about what I want to eat. I just look at my tracker! If I had to wake up every morning not knowing what I was going to eat, I would probably go through drive through’s and eat out!

I know that this Friday I will be going to my Robby’s nephews football game! Robby and I are going to have to leave around 4:00 because it is pretty far away from us. That means that dinner time will be at the game! So, I used my extra 49 weight watcher points already. My weeks run from Saturday-Friday which means that I don’t get those extra 49 points until next Saturday. So, at the football game, I really need to stick to my daily points allowance! I plan on packing a dinner for Robby and I and snacks for later! That way, we don’t even have to go to the concession stand and be tempted!

As you can see, planning is a lot of work, and it takes time! But, sitting down for 5 minutes a night is definitely worth it in order to live a healthy life and lose that weight! YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Comment below if you guys have ANY questions! Have fun with planning!
-xoxo M

WhAt I aTe WeDnEsDaY!

22 Aug

So..as promised, I am going to share with you guys EVERYTHING I ate today! So many people struggle with coming up with food ideas when they are trying to lose weight or just eat healthy! It takes a lot of experimenting! I still struggle with it…sometimes NOTHING looks good in my fridge or pantry. Its about being creative and listening to your cravings! So….here is “what I ate Wednesday!”

Breakfast: 1/2 of an Arnold 100% whole wheat sandwich thin toasted…with an egg fried up (cooking spray in pan;break yolk)…with a slice of reduced fat cheese and tomatoes! I always like to pair carbs and protein together for breakfast! It helps to give me the energy I need and it keeps me full all day long!

Snack: I needed a quick and easy snack today….I was really busy with running errands….So, I sliced up a Fuji apple and dipped the slices into 1 TBSP natural peanut butter. Such a treat!!

Lunch: Lunch was quick and easy today! Chicken breast baked in the oven with a little bit of Cajun chicken seasoning. A side of broccoli. and of course a little bit of ketchup! I LOVE ketchup and have to watch how much I eat. But, I will never give it up! I tried not eating it for a month and ended up gaining weight because I would pick at more food because I was missing having it! Crazy, I know…but having it works best for me! All in moderation!

Dinner: I was meeting an old Weight Watcher friend tonight for dinner at Panera Bread. You have to be careful there! A lot of the things on the menu are TERRIBLE for you!! However, they have a HIDDEN menu with AMAZING options! Tonight I had the Power Mediterranean chicken salad. It has spinach, lettuce, grilled chicken, tomatoes, and a hard boiled egg. Dressing was olive oil and lemon juice on the side! So good and it felt like I was eating something bad!

Snack: I LOVE to have a snack at night after dinner. It is something I will always do! Now, when I was overweight the portion would be HUGE! Almost 3 bowels of cereal. Now, I make sure I measure everything out! I had a good amount of points left over tonight so I was able to have a higher point snack. I had 1 cup of Raisin Bran with Flax seeds and 1 cup of skim milk!

I hope this gave you some insight into what my days look like! typically its breakfast, lunch, dinner, and two snacks! Sometimes I can fit in 3 snacks! I track my food by using Weight Watchers points plus values. Everyone has a different points plus value depending on height, weight, age, and gender.

What were some of the things you guys ate or tried today that you really enjoy having?!

-God bless and live healthy!
– M xoxo

S’mores, Pizza Pies, Cookies….OH MY!

19 Aug

I’m back from the mountains! I had such an amazing time and did not want to come home! It was so peaceful and just what I needed. My mom, dad, and I went up Thursday and had so much fun. We grilled hamburgers, made a campfire, and really just enjoyed each others company. Here’s the house we stayed in! It is a good family friends cabin…They were kind enough to let us use it! The backyard was beautiful as well. The water was right there! There’s nothing better than the sound of rippling water! So peaceful.


Friday morning my boyfriend, Robby, was able to come! I was so glad he was able to get away from work for a little! We really just hung out and enjoyed not having to do anything! We knew we wanted to make a fire that night…So we took a walk through the woods. I always thought I was the outdoorsy type…However, I realized I AM NOT! First I wore flip flops and shorts…Not a good idea! So then I changed into shoes, pants, a hoodie, and a hat! I was all set! We collected some nice sticks for the fire! It was actually really fun!



Saturday morning we went to the local ski resort that was 15 minutes away. They had a summer activity package that included tubing, slides, swimming, bowling, mini golf, paddleboats, rockwalls, and more! Our favorite part of it was to be able to ride the ski lift as many times as we wanted! There is something so peaceful about being about the trees and soaring with the birds! At the top of the lift was a beautiful lake! We really enjoyed being on the paddleboats!



One of the most exciting things for me however, was the rockwall! When I was overweight…There were multiple times where I encountered a rock wall. I was never able to do it. So, I knew I needed to try! I was nervous. Seeing it brought back all of the humiliating moments of not being able to either fit in the harness or not being able to lift myself up it. But Robby was right there encouraging me and I knew I could do it! I did it….But I didn’t get very far! Who knew I was SO afraid of heights and falling! I made it half-way up….And that was enough for me! It felt so good finally being able to do something I couldn’t do when I was overweight!

Now…along with all of these fun activities…there was food. A lot of it. And it wasn’t healthy. The majority of the summer I deprived myself of treats and things that I was craving. Deprivation is a terrible habit. Because in the end it backfires, which is what happened to me at the cabin. I didn’t eat one healthy thing and my portion sizes were way too big. Now…it is ok to enjoy yourself on vacation. It is ok to spurge and enjoy the food. But, I went back into my binging ways. I could have easily packed a healthy breakfast or a healthy lunch. Instead I stocked up on everything that I wanted all summer but didn’t let myself have. If I would have given myself more leeway over the summer and had more treats, this overeating at the cabin wouldn’t have happened.

I look at this as a learning opportunity. I know now that depriving myself doesn’t do any good. Because when I was binging on all of the bad food… I was feeling guilty. Which shouldn’t happen. Treats are meant to be a good thing! Your body needs them to speed up your metabolism! If I had allowed treats throughout the summer…and ate healthy meals along with treats at the cabin…the guilt wouldn’t be there. SO please…DONT DEPRIVE! Have a treat. Enjoy it. Plan for it. And get back on track the next day. If you do weight watchers like I do…count the points for it and use your extra 49 points! It is allowed to have French fries, pizza, and ice cream…but in moderation! I am human. I sometimes slip up. I sometimes go back to binge eating. However, I can recognize it now and move on. Today I was back in the gym, tracking my points, and eating healthy! It feels so good! Before I would have said forget it…I ate bad 4 days. Might as well give up on eating healthy. If that sounds like you…. 4 days of eating bad wont make you gain 20 pounds. Just like 4 days of lifting weights wont make you strong. It is ok to slip up! Just don’t give up!

I hope this post helps some of you. Having a treat meal should be a fun and exciting thing. Too many people think of it as a bad thing. Like I said before. Don’t deprive. Plan. Enjoy. Get back on track!

-xoxo M

YoU aRe BeAuTiFuL!

15 Aug

Well with the start of school fastly approaching … My family is taking a much needed mini vacation. Our friends were nice enough to let us use their amazing cabin in the mountains for the weeked! They just redid it..and apparently it is amazing! Stay tuned for pictures 😉 My boyfriend is able to come too and I am so thrilled! We plan to go hiking, swim in the water, and enjoy spending time around the campfire! There will be treats…S’mores, Pizza pies, and cookies. However, is is vacation. Deprivation can do horrible things to your body and mind. I haven’t gone away this summer yet…So some treats are necessary! It is all about moderation! You better believe I will get right back on track on Sunday when we get home!

I wanted to leave you all with a positive saying since I won’t be able to post until Sunday (there is no service or WIFI at the cabin).
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
Today’s society is way to harsh on people. With the amount of makeup, hair, and skin products it is hard for anyone to feel that they are naturally beautiful..flaws and all. Well let me tell you something…
YOU ARE
I have stretch marks, loose skin, and imperfections that I tend to focus too much on. But at the end of the day..I know that God made me how I am for a reason. I tell myself every morning before the start of my day that I AM BEAUTIFUL. So…that’s you mission until Sunday. Tell yourself that everday…And know I think you are too!

-God Bless and Live Healthy
– M xoxo

a cinderella story

12 Aug

My lovely cousin Whitney told a story about me on her blog! Her kind words brought tears to my eyes.

whimsy and whit

My beautiful cousin Maria is on of the most inspirational people I know. As a matter of fact, she is on the cover of this weeks people magazine and now the whole world can see how amazing she is (she’s in the yellow!).

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When Maria was growing up, she struggled with her weight. She has always been beautiful, but one day she decided she wanted to make a change and start leading a healthier and happier life.

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Maria’s before picture

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Maria now!

After joining Weight Watchers and using diet, exercise, and plain determination, my beautiful cousin lost over 100 pounds. Her goal is to now inspire people who are struggling with their weight like she once was, and I know that she will go on to help a lot of people reach their goals. She not only looks beautiful now, but she is so much happier. I couldn’t be prouder…

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